Sometimes you find yourself loving and loathing the internet in equal measures. You find yourself both despairing at humanity and being ridiculously proud of it at the same time. Let me explain....
There is a company called Delicious who feature on Amazon selling shoes and fancy dress costumes such as the Women’s Phd Darling Sexy Costume because we all know that being brainy is nothing unless you are sexy with it.
It comes with a front zipper (obviously) and includes the hat, gold sash and even the diploma - I know, what a bargain!
Now I could harp on in sardonic tones about how far we have supposedly come since the Suffragette Movement when women were seen as delicate little things who could not be trusted with a vote or even a job. Bless them. But this time I don’t have to because the good folk who make up the internet masses have done the job for me.
If you scroll down to the customer reviews you will find an amazing selection of light-hearted, witty and genius reviews. Here are just a few of my favourites:
Finally! What we lady PhDs actually wear to class
As a lady PhD student, let me say how much of a relief it is to see them accurately describe what we wear every day. I don't care if it isn't proper PPE, how else will we find husbands if not for our degree in sexy? Bravo to Delicious costumes for supporting women's education in letting us know that we're only as smart as our skirts are short.
I've got your "Feminist Mystique" right here!
First things first, I am a lady Ph.D.
Like all lady Ph.Ds, I frequently ask myself: "How could I be sexier?"
Delicious costumes has come to my rescue! I can now lecture in my 5 inch gold spiked heels and "barely there" regalia while giving nary a thought to the male gaze and its implications on the prevalence of rape culture in our society.
I fully expect my chili pepper rating on RMP to go through the roof once I begin to greet my students in this costume. Hopefully I can keep my "post structural hegemonies" from engaging in some wardrobe malfunctions. Then again, who cares?
I'm sexy! Forget about the 7 years I spent sweating out a dissertation and engaging in innovative research!
DIPLOMA INCLUDED?!?!
Why the hell did I put myself through ten years of grad school!! Lesson learned.
Now this costume is still for sale on Amazon.com along with a selection of others such as the ‘Sexy Scholar Costume’ and the ‘Playboy Bunny Cop’ – just what us women need in our Christmas stockings! Shame they don’t seem to do many men’s costumes. I wonder why that is? Could there be a market out there for a Men’s Phd Darling Sexy Costume? How about a Men’s Sexy Scholar Costume? After all who doesn’t want to see a grown man dressed in a little boy’s school uniform?
All I can really say however, is thank God for the wit and wisdom of the Amazon reviewers – I take my sexy Phd hat off to you all.